I met someone today. He was funny and intriguing. And he made me feel smart and interesting.
We met doing community service. I won't get into details, but a charge was laid against me that was false, but sometimes it's easier to just move on than fight. I thought I would dread having to go and do those hours. But now ... I can't wait for each time I can go back. I look forward to seeing him again. Even if it is while doing work I would normally loathe.
John. That's his name. So ordinary. One that I would normally hate. And yet I don't dislike it on him. Somehow it seems ironic. As if the plainness of his name only serves to highlight how unique and brilliant he is.
We met on a Saturday afternoon after I had already been there for hours. We were sorting a huge bin of food. And most of it was rotten. Unfortunately, all of my "friends" I normally work with weren't there so I was with three guys that I wasn't thrilled to be working with. And then along comes another guy who, to be honest, just made me want to laugh. I mean, here we are in a warehouse sorting through rotten vegetables and he walks in all khaki pants, and plaid button down, and little cap like he's going somewhere. It was ridiculous. Normally I laugh at those people. And privately, I did laugh at him.
There was this young guy there, maybe 19 or 20, who was just one of those kids that after a few minutes of talking to him you just wanted to punch him in the face. The work we're doing is disgusting and often the food is so rotten that they are just mush and fall apart in our hands. Naturally, we are all wearing gloves. Except that one kid. I comment on this and he starts spouting off on how he's not a germ-aphobic and he can handle a bit of rottenness and blah blah blah. Whatever. I think he's an idiot. So I call him on his bluff. And I say, "Here - take this" and toss a potato at him. And of course he pulls away. But what I wasn't counting on was the potato then smashing and splattering all over John. And that's when those deep brown eyes looked up at me and I saw them full of laughter.
From there, it was just ... natural. Easy. Our conversations flowed. Apparently we are both people that like to observe and mock those around us. For the next few hours we laughed and talked and got to know each other. In a short amount of time we had even developed "bits" based on those around us. Looking at each other and dramatically saying, "Oh my God! What is that?!?!" or repeating the phrases that the sorority sisters next to us kept uttering. And believe me - they were no wordsmiths. Occasionally the target of our mockery would be close so we'd have lean in and whisper to each other. Doing so I would catch a trace of his smell - clean and manly but not showy.
Now, I know that I'm not much of a catch. I've gained a bit of weight in the last few years and as I was there to work I was not looking my finest. And yet when he looked at me I felt like maybe I could be desirable. But honestly, what was so appealing was that he talked to me. He listened. We didn't talk about anything of consequence, but he still listened. And I found myself to be interesting! It's been so long since I have talked with someone and laughed and had such a good time.
Eventually we found ourselves alone. It wasn't that we sequestered ourselves, it was more that the others left and we felt no need to follow. We were content to be just as we were. To talk. To laugh. To tease. To look into each others' eyes and see a longing. Oh the longing! It wasn't lusting for each other's bodies. It wasn't sexual. It was a spark that made us want to get to know each other for who we are. That spark that makes you talk for hours and wish for more time.
In a blink it was time to go. We were both hesitant to leave, but at the same time neither of us wanted to act on our feelings. So we said our goodbyes and hoped to see each other soon. And then walked away. Now I can only hope and pray and wait for our next meeting.
It was a wonderful afternoon. There's only one problem - I'm married.
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